93 years is a long-ass time to live

Gerald R. Ford was our kind of unelected president. From the Associated Press:

Even after two women tried separately to kill him, the presidency of Jerry Ford remained open and plain.

Not imperial. Not reclusive. And, of greatest satisfaction to a nation numbed by Watergate, not dishonest.

Even to millions of Americans who had voted two years earlier for Richard Nixon, the transition to Ford's leadership was one of the most welcomed in the history of the democratic process -- despite the fact that it occurred without an election.

***

On Aug. 9, 1974, after seeing Nixon off to exile, Ford assumed the office. The next morning, he still made his own breakfast and padded to the front door in his pajamas to get the newspaper.

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Lynette ''Squeaky'' Fromme, a 26-year-old follower of Charles Manson, was arrested after she aimed a semiautomatic pistol at Ford on Sept. 5 in Sacramento, Calif. A Secret Service agent grabbed her and Ford was unhurt.

Seventeen days later, Sara Jane Moore, a 45-year-old political activist, was arrested in San Francisco after she fired a gun at the president. Again, Ford was unhurt.

Both women are serving life terms in federal prison.

Asked at a news conference to recite his accomplishments, Ford replied: ''We have restored public confidence in the White House and in the executive branch of government.''

As to his failings, he responded, ''I will leave that to my opponents. I don't think there have been many.''

Ford spent most of his boyhood in Grand Rapids, Mich.

***

Ford played center on the University of Michigan's 1932 and 1933 national champion football teams. He got professional offers from the Detroit Lions and the Green Bay Packers, but chose to study law at Yale, working his way through as an assistant varsity football coach and freshman boxing coach.

Hey assholes. Can I emphasize something? He may have been a U.S president, but before that, he was something more important: a University of Michigan football player and a two-time national champion. Priorities, please.

In conclusion, I invite nytimes.com to suck my fat cock. Ford's library is in Ann Arbor, MI, and his foundation is based in Grand Rapids, MI. Neither has a relation to Austin, TX. I write that from his mother country.

So fuck you, Texas. Stop trying to steal our center, RIP.