Saturday, October 21, 2006

On love and loss

Just got off the horn with CrimeNotes, who is in football-fan hell. He has a wedding to attend this weekend, in the suburbs of a mid-sized American city that happens to be in ACC territory. He and a friend just spent two hours sitting at a Hooters only to be informed moments ago by the staff that the Michigan-Iowa game "just isn't on any network anywhere."

Apparently, much conversation and attempted explanation ensued before they finally threw up their hands in frustration. My co-blogger will now spend the rest of the day drinking, trying not to think about football, and dancing the Hora. Weeping in frustration is optional, though he can always explain it away by saying that he's a sentimental fool at weddings.

Also, in two hours at a Hooters, he's probably had more than his weekly RDA of eye candy, so maybe the day's not a total loss.

Who would you rather watch shake it on a football Saturday? Yeah, me too.


Flop said...

To be clear (and yes, I'm leaving up the original, poorly worded post rather than just fixing it) I would rather watch Mike Hart. Not that I don't enjoy watching fit, pretty ladies in snug-fitting clothing, but Hooters is open seven days a week. Or so CrimeNotes tells me.

CrimeNotes said...

Oh, this is just a Cliff's Notes version that may imply that my co-adventurer and I did not do proper diligence in advance or that we normally use Hooter's as a default sports bar. This thwarting arose despite advance phone calls -- but not only did this particular Hooters not have ESPN GamePlan, it didn't carry ABC at all.

As far as the Hora goes, two fellow gentiles and I somehow ended up in the center of the action, and despite having attended many Jewish weddings, I had no idea what to do and neither did they. I became flustered and it all sort of turned into a gentile-led clapping circle.

winston said...

any sort of booty shaking is acceptable horah protocol. the hooters chicks would probably be a big hit. i think it is a testament to cn's love of michigan football that he was willing to slum it at hooters. he's way too classy for that shit.

CrimeNotes said...

Hooters had a lot of families, a couple sketchy addict-looking guys, 1-2 pretty ladies in hotpants, a few less-than-pretty ladies in hotpants, at least one old married couple, and no Michigan game.

Flop said...

As I'm sure most of our readers know, you can do all the due diligence you want, but getting a game on the dish at any sports bar at any time is always, always a crapshoot.

Also, our readers know you would totally love any excuse to go to Hooters.

As a former resident of ACC country (now with 100 percent more Northerners!), I recall having to watch Michigan-Ohio State one year at an Applebees off Interstate 81 in Virginia. Not what you'd call ideal.

winston said...


tigers just evened the series. i'm a happy girl.

Crunk Raconteur said...

Agreed that it is a total crapshoot. In September, Flop got an aggravated phone call from me one Saturday evening, as I left my local sports fooddrinkery. I had called ahead to see if the, er, minor college football game I wanted to watch that night between Ohio State and Texas was going to be on the big screens and with the audio, and was assured that it would be.

When I got there, the whole place (and it is large) was full of people wearing a disgusting shade of orange.

But it's even worse than you think...because it wasn't THAT disgusting shade of was a shade of orange that was also accompanied by many (before the game even started!) impromptu renditions of "Rocky Top"...for a game against freaking Air Force!

Fortunately we were able to audiblize out to another bar, and I got to throw out some derisive laughter and a "Don't these people know that they lost to Vanderbilt?" on my way out the door.

But still. Grrr.