Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Don't forget that the witch had a sister
I'm jealous of confident sports fans, the ones who always think that their team is going to win and then blame their losses on biased refs.
I am not that kind of sports fan. In my mind, the team is always on the verge of a spectacular self-imposed collapse, and most of its wins can be attributed to bullet-dodging and dumb luck.
All through last night, I expected a fourth-quarter collapse: for the Western states to buoy the Republicans, for the news that McCaskill, Webb or Tester weren't able to make the cut. Through mid-afternoon, I waited for reports that Virginia had fallen apart and that John Tester had been lapped in Montana.
It wasn't until Don Rumsfeld resigned that I took a deep breath and realized that it was safe to wake up.
In less than 24 hours, the greatest villain of our lifetime has resigned in disgrace, and there's promise that Constitutional order will be restored.
I have a new sympathy for what the Munchkins went through after some house dropped out of the sky and flattened that fucking witch. I'm peeking from behind the corner, eyes half-covered, still trying to figure out whether it's real and whether I can celebrate.
I now move that Cole Slaw Blog adjourn this meeting of Policy Roundtable. Because in the near term, we've got bigger things to think about.
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"Tomorrow you're all going to wake up in a brave new world -- a world where the constitution gets trampled by an army of terrorist clones created in a stem cell research lab run by homosexual doctors who sterilize their instruments over burning American flags. Where tax-and-spend Democrats take all your hard-earned money and use it to buy electric cars for National Public radio and to teach evolution to illegal immigrants. Oh, and everybody's high."
- Steven Colbert on Election Day
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