Monday, November 06, 2006

We're gonna start it with a positive jam

We win approximately 22 seats in the House. I base this conclusion on the political blogs I read and nothing more.

Jim Webb loses in Virginia. I have no reason to say this, aside from a suspicion that many Virginians are insane and that the ballot problems are going to screw enough people in a tight race.

Harold Ford loses. I won't shed any tears.

Claire McCaskill, my favorite, squeaks it out in Missouri. I say this based on the belief that if she loses, I will cry. Because I love her.

John Tester wins. He's tits and smashtastic rolled into one. (That's how I'm quoted in his ads.)

No worries about New Jersey, Rhode Island, Pennsylvania or Maryland.

And Ohio, if you put a gun to my head, I'd rather have Sherrod Brown in the Senate than see Michigan beat the Buckeyes. It's not going to come down to that, because that's not how democracy works until Mark Burnett takes over.

I think that leaves the Senate 50-50, with Dick Cheney casting tie-breaking votes.

It obviously will make me happy if the Democrats clean up, although it will prompt the White House to incite Constitutional crises on a near-weekly basis. Shit will get a whole lot crazier, bastards are going to ignore subpoenas, and I sort of worry that the White House will push the Constitution even closer to a breaking point.

I also worry that by midnight on Tuesday I'm going to feel like we live in a banana republic, and not the kind that sells beige shit to yuppies.

In New York, we have the luxury of voting for Democrats under the more progressive Working Families Party line. We can also vote for the lame Green Party candidate as a protest against Hillary. I plan to do these things.

Since this is an actual post about politics, as opposed to an effort to have fun that backfired badly, let's fight in the comments.

6 comments:

22280 said...

25 to 30 in the House. Webb wins, although you're right about Virginians. Mizzou and Montana keep the Senate in GOP hands.

Harold Ford would have won if he'd gone to a better school than Penn.

CrimeNotes said...

Harold Ford did go to a better school than Penn. He went to Michigan Law.

I'd rather have McCaskill than Webb. We'll see. A poll came out last night that had her up by 6. Maybe Montana will turn out to be the snag.

Genevieve said...

many virginians ARE insane. i would vote for webb but it's so cold out and i don't feel like leaving my office.

oh apathy.

Crunk Raconteur said...

In my pool (yeah, I know, I'm a huge dork), I came up with Democrats +21 in the House, although there were so many races on there (about 60) that once I got to +15 I started getting really conservative with my picks.

As for the Senate, it's Democrats +5. Take Pennsylvania, Ohio, Rhode Island, Missouri; keep New Jersey and Maryland. Then it comes down to the final three: Montana, Virginia, Tennessee. Unfortunately, for the Dems to take control of the senate, we have to win all three (because in a 51-49 Senate, if you don't think Lieberman is flipping, you're crazy). I think we win Montana, but lose both Virginia and Tennessee.

That's why we need Genevieve to go vote...and as an extra added bonus, think about all the fun, snarky things you can say to any Allen campaigners you encounter...

CrimeNotes said...

Yeah Genevieve, you're not one of the crazy ones I was calling out. Go vote for Webb!

CrimeNotes said...

Hey, here are some updated polls:

Missouri, McCaskill leads Talent 49 - 46

Montana, Tester leads Burns 49 - 44

New Jersey, Menendez leads Kean 50 - 41

Tennessee, Corker leads Ford 48 -47