Sunday, November 27, 2005

10-year reunion

If you went to high school with me and you're a chick, chances are good that you have three kids, and they're all blond. Chances also are good that you look better today than you did in high school, and that you like dancing to "Hollaback Girl."

Halfway through my high school reunion, the crowd self-segregated into married people and single people. I made peace with this issue a few years ago, but many of my former classmates have not. In between stories about Las Vegas and smoking pot outside abandoned jails, they made bitter remarks about marriage ruining people, but conceded that a lot of the women looked good despite having kids.

Those of us living in coastal cities thought we were superior. People who didn't already know appeared confused when I told them that I live in New York. There seems to be a general misconception that all we do is snort coke off models' tits and close billion-dollar deals. I did my best to encourage this misapprehension.

At the end of the night, all the married people had gone home. There was a disagreement about whether to go to a Coney Island place or to somebody's house. Somebody talked about renting a motel room. Not wanting to partake in an orgy with my single former classmates, I called it a night and caught a ride home.

1 comment:

evil girl said...

while likewise attending a high school reunion over the weekend, i found people to be pretty much the same as they were a decade back, and the weird part is that it wasn't even my alma matter.

i also found that girls like to display their breasts, wear cheap dresses, and that married people are bound and determined to pair up other people as fast as possible before the arc sinks and they're the only ones on it.

and most importantly, i found out that if you fill out your name tag with the word "enthused," your date may become disgruntled.