OSU Fans: "Hey, you guys going to prison?"The crack undercover news team at NBC 4 in Columbus did the legwork on that one.
Fake Spartan Fan: "No."
OSU Fans: "...cause I guarantee the guys at Ohio State are going to (expletive) you guys in the (expletive). [OSU fans laugh] I guarantee it. I guarantee it. You're going to go to that stadium and these guys are (going to) be like, '(expletive) bend over, (expletive).' I'm telling you right now."
Fake Spartan Fan: "We're just going to go enjoy the game."
I expect this shit when Buckeyes see Michigan fans, but why treat Sparty that way? It's like hanging outside the special ed. class with a team of dobermans. Those poor fans have enough self-esteem problems without prison rape scenarios.
Some of our commenters took umbrage at linking college football to presidential politics. This proves that Ohioans, in addition to being prison-rapist Republicans (hellooooo, Scooter Libby!) also are thin-skinned. When you burp OSU out of a syphillitic, Land Grant womb, bad things happen. Karma's a bitch. What, wanna brag some more about Andy Katzenmoyer and Warren G. Harding?
6 comments:
Tom, I swear to God, if you take the bait and make me, Ohio State fans, and Ohioans in general look even worse again, I'll...well, I won't do what THOSE OSU fans threatened to do...but it won't be pleasant...
Ew. And here I was about to provide a counterweight by extolling the virtues of Great Americans from Ohio. In particular: Thomas Edison, the Wright Brothers, Desmond Howard, Neil Armstrong, Alan Shepard, Langston Hughes and Charles Woodson.
I'm sure Langston Hughes had a great experience growing up there.
You can claim credit for John Glenn, Kucinich, and Howard Metzenbaum. That's it. Like many a midwesterner, the rest waited until they moved elsewhere before they did anything good.
Again with the ancillary details distracting from the actual game. It would be sad, really, if it wasn't so hilarious to me...
(note to Flop: Touche, sir. Excellent sneaking of Messrs. Howard and Woodson onto that list)
I'm proud that I wrote a post about Michigan-O.S.U. that included 1.) a small swipe at local news, 2.) special ed. class, 3.) Scooter Libby and 4.) syphillis. If you're looking for a comparison of offensive lines, look elsewhere. I'd rather write my own offensive lines, thank you very much.
Offensive lines! That was Crimenotes everybody! Don't forget to tip your Slaw Sommeliers!
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