Thursday, February 01, 2007

"Whatever happens, I feel like my hair is safe at the moment"

Apologies in advance for this new freshet of bile, but I'm still stunned and appalled by the whole Boston mess.

Let's review: Signs with lights depicting a cartoon character appear in Boston, along with nine other cities. Boston authorities lose their heads, then upon reflection realize they've gone too far. So they decide to pretend that the people responsible for the signs were actually trying to trick them all along.

The media in Boston appears set to join them. Check out this whining, scolding and utterly craven editorial from The Boston Globe.

... [A]nyone older than 8 or 9 should be able to understand the dangers of staging such a stunt in the post-Sept. 11 world. Homeland Security experts will need to review the response of local law enforcement. Public safety personnel may have overreacted; local bloggers apparently identified the guerrilla advertising campaign early on.

May have overreacted? I think shutting down the city and calling NORAD because of cartoon characters might be the very definition of overreacting. God help Bostonians if they ever got a gander of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade here.

Of course, this point will be lost on the "better-safe-than-sorry" crowd, whom we can also thank for random searches on the subway, long lines at airports and basically the second term of Bush's presidency. This is even dumber than the panic over Aqua Fresh and Vaseline Intensive Care. (Look out! He's moisturizing!)

It's already clear that the media in Boston is going to side with the powers that be. (Better safe than sorry, right guys?) It's especially clear after the two artists' brilliant, dadaist press conference today. Watch this video. You can almost hear all the reporters stamping their feet and demanding that this Very Serious Situation get the respect it deserves.

Sounds like this mess is getting exactly the appropriate amount of respect.

UPDATE: I reworked the second paragraph to tone down my rage. I also wanted to point out that this column is not only the height of hackery (it is the Herald after all) but it's also one of the saddest, most hate-filled things I've read. My read of Howie Carr's ideal America is one filled with white males who dress neatly, major in finance and stay the hell off his lawn.


crimenotes said...

I've blocked out the years that I've lived in Boston. This reminds me why. For those who think of it as a cute, mini-New York with Red Sox and the Cheers bar, it is, in fact, a capital of self-righteous melodrama. I'm sure that it boosts Boston's self-esteem to imagine that terrorists give a shit about chowder and shitty bridges.

DrunkBrunch said...

Whenever I think about Boston, I'm reminded of a line from the movie Clueless (paraphrased): "It's like a Monet. From far away, it's OK. but up close, it's a big old mess."

amish said...

That video was one of the most brilliant things I've ever seen. I have never looked forward to spending 10 bucks to support a movie so much.